Bereaved Mother's Day

Today on Bereaved Mother’s Day I remember my precious Nora- I remember her every day of course, but today is a day that is just for her and I. Today I get to rejoice in being Nora’s mummy.

I didn’t know Bereaved Mother’s Day even existed until I joined this club that no mother wants to join. At first I wasn’t sure I liked the idea of it. Why does there have to be a seperate day— Mother’s Day is Mother’s Day for all mums isn’t it?

But now I see it differently- in a world that is always turning, always busy, always moving forward…and not always ready or willing to talk about the sad things in life, it’s important to have days like this…so that mums like me — bereaved mums— get a chance to be seen as mothers to the children we hold in our hearts and not just the ones you may see in our arms.

I am a mother to Nora today (and every day).

While you won’t ever again see me hold her, feed her, bathe and dress her, read her a story or sing her a song…I mother her in many other ways. I mother her by talking about her and including her in our family adventures. I mother her every time I look through her photos with a smile or a tear. I mother her every time we say hello to a butterfly or put flowers in her vase. I mother every time I hear her siblings say her name. I mother her each night when I run my fingers over her urn and say goodnight. And I mother her every time I promise to do better, be better, try harder, love deeper.

I’m her mother. She is my daughter. And today is our day.

So today on Bereaved Mother’s Day I stand with all mum’s whose arms may be empty or longing but whose hearts are forever filled with love. I give thanks for the gift of my sweet Nora and the privilege of being her mumma. And I celebrate all the mothers who long to be seen — not just today but everyday — as mothers to their sweet angels.

Happy Bereaved Mother’s Day- may you smile through your tears and find comfort and joy in the memories of the babies you hold in your heart.